Being Real in An Artificial World - re: Friendships

That was our pastor's message yesterday. He really challenged us to reach out of ourselves and our lives to newcomers in our midst.

I sat there thinking, "How do I have time to do this?" It feels like every minute of my day is full. In reality, it's only full of the things that I choose to fill it. Of course, "stuff" happens, but on the norm, I choose what fills my day.

However, do I want to fill it finding out about other people and their lives? Do I want to involve them in my life? Why would they want to involve me in THEIR lives? My house is too small to have very many people over. My front yard isn't all that fancy. Geesh . . . This feels like performance anxiety.

We really are nice people - my family that is. I like us! I just think that most people would think we're . .uhm . .different. Afterall, we homeschool. We do a lot of church things. We enjoy creating on the computer. Some of our best friends are online. Some of our strongest ministry IS online. We just don't run into too many people like us.

So to meet new people, we've got to rethink our lives. We have to not do what we do to do what other people do. Is that selfish of us to not want to use our time doing stuff we really don't want to do?

I know there's a give and take in relationships. Our Pastor gave these five factors in friendships from John 15:12-17. They are acceptance, openness to share, respect, sacrifice and stimulating to growth. I need to learn how to do this friendship style better I guess. I do know that with my current friends, these factors are happening. I am wondering though with how many people you really can DO all these factors?

It feels overwhelming.

Looking for a Domain Name

I'm looking for a domain name for a website I hope to be creating very soon.

I don't have the final "ok" for it's creation just yet, but I'm working in areas where I can until I get the "ok".

I need to find those words that describe a place that is easy to come to because there's interesting stuff to read. At this site will be dialogue about community and life in general. I'm looking for a name that will tell internet surfers they can agree, or disagree (agreeable that is) and yet find community that won't be disingenuous in the journey. Be real seems to be the cry. I want this place to be a haven to share the hurt, the joy, the pain or just the day to day journey. What if we found a place to tell about our day, to offer prayer if wanted, to at least be a listening ear and, at the end of the day, find the comfort of community.

Hmmm . . .

comfort

community

dialogue

agree or disagree

learn

lean

lead

journey

path

Any other suggestions?

Measuring Currencies of Success

"Currency" reminds me of money. It doesn't have to be money. It could be something spent or something earned . . . or both.

In looking at a new creative step in my life, a question (is it worth it?) that comes to mind. I will spend time, money and my energy. What will be the "payback"? I've heard that people who go into business don't expect a "return" for at least a year. How unspiritual is it to think this way? Andrian Warnock's encouragement to successful blogging had many great points, but I latched on to one of his questions, "what are the currencies of success?". My mind went to that tension between what is given and what is returned . . . and the measuring thereof. At this point, I am seeing that the joy of pouring out what is a passion for me will (for a while at least) be that "currency" that will sustain me. I'm still thinking about this though.

Another thought along this line . . .

I just read a Kris Krug interview with Douglas Rushkoff who wrote a book titled "Get Back In The Box". At this blogging, this book isn't released yet, but the interview stirred a couple of interesting things in me. I am seeing that even though I was trained to 1) be the best at what I do, 2) have the best reviews at what other have seen of me and (among other things) 3) do NOT share the secrets of my successes, I am lessening myself really by not being part of a collective that shares knowlege and values every part of the whole. No more closed offices where the "secrets" reside. Finding out what those around you really have to offer to you (and you to them) will create a sense of community and vision that can be bought into more easily. Why? Because everyone is needed. No one is just along for the ride. The value of each really is raised so that the total productiveness of the whole is greater than the individuals singularly. Somehow in the midst of this the value of each individual is not lost though.

Maybe that's why the term "emergent" is so current. The whole picture of community and being a learner along with the group is so much more appealing than the "boss" and "plebes" idea. A paradigm shift must occur. It seems like a very vulnerable one. Again the question is asked . . "it is worth it?"

The measure of "worth it" appears to be the currency in the days ahead.

Waiting and Learning

It's amazing to know that God wants to open up new doors of ministry opportunity. Maybe not all that new afterall, but certainly avenues not previously opened to me in any large measure.

I wanted to create a website for my church, but after research I've found that anything that would create any sense of life or joy really needs much more skill than I have at this moment. My delimma has been whether I want to jump on the steep learning curve and go for it, or whether I'm just out of my league and I need to let the idea go. Thankfully, I've found something that will undergird my vision without the learning curve putting me flat on my back!

I ran into a site awhile back called echurchessentials. I don't know that I'm usually all that missionary minded unless I've just been with a really passionate missions person. I get stirred for a couple of days and then settle back into the "comfortable" place. This time was different. I read the byline in their header "the convergence of E-Church into Realty-Church". Because I've know the power of e-ministry over the past 5 years, I was intrigued by this site and the tools offered. While I know that putting together a good website probably wouldn't cost me the $80 per month that this site charges, the time it would take for me to do this would be far most costly. So there has been a convergence of another type for me . . . a tool that is within my framework of understand and my vision.

Consider this from the Barna Group, Cyberchurch2001

"George Barna, who directed the study for The Barna Institute, explained that numerous changes in people’s faith experience will emerge in the next few years. “By the end of the decade we will have in excess of ten percent of our population who rely upon the Internet for their entire spiritual experience. Some of them will be individuals who have not had a connection with a faith community, but millions of others will be people who drop out of the physical church in favor of the cyberchurch.” The researcher also stated that virtually every dimension of the faith community will be influenced by online faith developments. “We will have an explosion of self-produced and self-marketed worship music as an outgrowth of sophisticated and affordable digital technology that turns an artist into a full-fledged recording company, including the ability to directly and inexpensively market those products to the millions of consumers on the Internet. Within churches we will see e-mail broadcasting, theological chats, online meetings, broadcasts to congregants who are immobile, live webcasting of mission trips via webcams, and 24/7 ministry training from the best trainers and educators in the world.”

It's been 4 years since that report. Many of those "we will see" events are happening today in progressive internet ministries.

Consider a very recent Barna report, dated March 14, 2005:

"The Internet is the only mass medium among those tested whose audience share has grown during the past decade. The proportion of the population using the Internet for faith purposes has increased by two-thirds since 1998." (This is comparing TV and radio as well as the internet.)


Side note:
I know I'm on the right track. My daughter and I just spent an hour and a half on a conference call this week with her online school assistant principal. Next year her school interface will change to a system that will encorporate many more interactive tools. Was she impressed? Not all that much . . . cuz she is pretty active in her interactive skills already!

Sometimes the open doors feel endless . . .