That was our pastor's message yesterday. He really challenged us to reach out of ourselves and our lives to newcomers in our midst.
I sat there thinking, "How do I have time to do this?" It feels like every minute of my day is full. In reality, it's only full of the things that I choose to fill it. Of course, "stuff" happens, but on the norm, I choose what fills my day.
However, do I want to fill it finding out about other people and their lives? Do I want to involve them in my life? Why would they want to involve me in THEIR lives? My house is too small to have very many people over. My front yard isn't all that fancy. Geesh . . . This feels like performance anxiety.
We really are nice people - my family that is. I like us! I just think that most people would think we're . .uhm . .different. Afterall, we homeschool. We do a lot of church things. We enjoy creating on the computer. Some of our best friends are online. Some of our strongest ministry IS online. We just don't run into too many people like us.
So to meet new people, we've got to rethink our lives. We have to not do what we do to do what other people do. Is that selfish of us to not want to use our time doing stuff we really don't want to do?
I know there's a give and take in relationships. Our Pastor gave these five factors in friendships from John 15:12-17. They are acceptance, openness to share, respect, sacrifice and stimulating to growth. I need to learn how to do this friendship style better I guess. I do know that with my current friends, these factors are happening. I am wondering though with how many people you really can DO all these factors?
It feels overwhelming.
3 comments:
Thank you Aga . . . your friendship is so important to me too! I guess I am trying to find affirmation in what I do online. My friends here have no idea how incredible it was to meet you face to face! Had I not been online, I would have never had that chance. I really am trying to bring every area of my life into a new light and see if I'm just kidding myself or if I really am in a new era of "friendships". It's very interesting because I really have no one face to face with whom to talk at the levels of "heart" that I've found online. Maybe if I spent time with them like I do people onine, I would. I'm not sure how that time could be walked out in face to face life.
I believe also that online friendships are sent from God. I have some wonderful friends online, some whom i have met, many i havent this side of heaven. But i know that i am truly blessed by each one of them. Face to face friendships are good too, but somehow you cant go into the depth you can online..i dunno why ...
sue . . . Great to have you leave a comment. You're welcome any time!
Online friends somehow are able to say things that "in person" friends might not. Whether it's intimidation or whatever, the ability to say what you want, when you want opens up a world of possible communication.
I think the thing that is missed is the body language in communication. The smile, the smirk or the indifference create the atmosphere of acceptance or hesitancy. Those kinds of reactions really do bring "character" to relationships.
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