Something Different is Happening

This past weekend I was away at a retreat in Aspen, Colorado. It was such a lovely locale. The smells of Fall were in the air and the crispness of the morning temperature reminded me that I have wood splitting and stacking to do when I got home.

I'm back home now. School is going strong. Work is gearing up for the holidays. Christmas trees went on sale at my store this week. Things are very much the norm in this season, yet there is something different happening.

There is a huge change ahead of me. While I've been praying for many many weeks, I still don't have the pieces of information that will, at least in part, bring extreme change to my life. There's something exhilerating about the thought of change. (If this were a change in the messiness of my garage, I'm not sure I'd be all that excited.) Something different is happening.

As a general rule, I'm not all that thrilled with not knowing what's going on. When God is involved though, there is this mystique and intrigue that nags at my heart and spirit. I've been taught through the years that either I make things happen or "things will happen to me". With that philosophy coursing through my veins, the thought of waiting on God doesn't feel all that safe - or at least it hasn't in the past. Yet . . . something different is happening.

What mattered to me in my ministry seems to be taking a back seat these days to the thought of just hearing the Lord's heart for this fresh new day. Yes, what I've worked for over these years really is finding it's place in the archives of my history. Yes, what I thought would be my legacy to future generations is being cataloged as "how you always did it". But . . . something different is happening.

"The way I've done it in the past" feels like those weathered pages in an old memory album. I've called my repetitive actions "the same old, same old". Sure, I can joy in the things that God has done and the people He has touched through efforts I've created and implemented. Lives have changed and hearts were affected for eternity. But . . . something different is happening.

So, in these days of sameness in the season, there is a deep "something" happening. I believe I will be forever changed because of it. I believe it will impact how I create and implement for the Kingdom of God. I see an open door. Something different is happening . . .

Fall in Aspen

I'm sitting in the dark at the moment writing from a community computer at the Inn at Aspen in Aspen, Colorado. I'm here for a Women's Retreat. The first night in a strange bed was . . . well . . . the first night!

I'm leading worship at this retreat. I was so thankful that all the technical stuff seemed to work and things flowed smoothly. Singing at 9,000 ft is interesting. My breathe was left about 40 miles down the road!

I'm about to spend a day in sessions and enjoying the lovely locale of Aspen, Colorado. I'm looking forward to what God is up to. Something is different this year, but I really don't want to try to speculate why.

I need to go pick songs for two sessions today. My eyes feel like little burnt places. I'm looking forward to that bed being more friendly to me tonight!

About to Emerge

A friend of mine took this picture during one her her kids' science projects. We all know the story of emerging butterflies. At this moment I can't find it, but I did a blog many months ago around what happens when a caterpillar turns into a butterfly. One fact I didn't pick up was that once the butterfly comes to this stage in it's development, it has 3 days to emerge. Just the significance of 3 days is mind boggling to me!

I do see the timeliness of coming into the new place. If the butterfly doesn't come on out into the new place, it is (as my friend said) a "goner". I am just beginning to think on this process.

If anyone has info to add, sites to recommend or thoughts to interject . . . bring 'em on! I don't have time to jump into a discussion at the moment (I have to get to work).

Wind from His Storehouses

"He causes the clouds to rise over the earth. He sends the lightning with the rain and releases the wind from his storehouses." Ps 135:5

This morning I worshipped and prayed with a group of intercessors on a mountain overlooking our huge valley. I found myself shouting the praises of God. I was shouting His awesome Name, His mighty works and His precious promises. It felt like His wind pouring through me. I chuckled wondering if anybody watching from the houses below might wonder at what spectacle was happening above them. (I did find out that these intercessors have been quizzed on that before!)

Probably the most amazing event of the morning (6:30am - 8:00am) was watching the rain sweep across the valley. The thunder and lightening accompanied it so majestically. We didn't get rain where we were, but at the end as I was reading the Ps 135:5 verse, the wind started to blow on us. It felt like God was saying "this is the wind from My storehouse for you".

I'm sure there were many other profound moments for those there, but as the lightening flashed, the thunder sounded and the wind blew, something woke in me of the Presence of God being right there in that time. It was a God moment.

52 Days Have Past . . .

. . . and where am I?

. . . in a greater expectation for God to show up in my every day life!

"This is a time of letting the wind blow things out of your hands. This is a time of letting the wind blow in that which you must grab hold of. In times past, you would have loved to direct the wind in a way that it would blow certain things into your hands for your keeping. But this is a time that the wind is blowing and blowing loose. Let the blowing loose and the blowing away occur so that I can blow in what you need. I will sustain you. Don’t worry about your future. I will sustain you. But let Me blow loose what needs to be blown loose and let Me blow in what needs to be replaced." (52 Days prophetic word)

I'm supposedly through with this prayer and bible reading time. I am FAR from being done though. This has been an interesting time. I thought these 52 days would drag out, but here I am . . . done. I don't think I connected with everything that was intended, but I do know there have been incredible changes, not only in me personally, but in my sphere of influence.

We have had a major catastrophe in the southern United States that affects the whole country. Hurricane Katrina has left her strong imprint on my country. She has touched me emotionally, financially and socially. I am still working out how to live daily in the wake of her influence on my life.

My church family is in a major change mode. We have a month before we know what changes await us - a new pastor. The truth is that we really don't know if even then there will be a decision. It provides great opportunity for prayers to be made on behalf of who God would send to this congregation to pastor.

Then I have to ask if I am still connected to this congregation? I am continuing to read Leonard Sweet's book which is shaking my thinking about how to do "church" in the day we live in. The whole book is about how relationships thread through everything we encounter in life. Relationship is the key to knowing God. It's the key to fulfilled life on earth. It's the platform from which I can story the gospel. But . . .WHY is relationship so hard?? It's not that neat clean pulpit vs pew interaction. It takes work and time. Both of those things drain the life out of a person sometimes! I am coming to learn though, that the deep places that God calls out to in us can only be opened in the community of relationship. Communing with God is a community - God and me. At every level of my life it's about that relationship in and around community. So, how can I just leave a community - the one I call my church?

Maybe the relationships I have are still "community" because we are all a part of the body of Christ. (Listen . . . at this point, I'm asking questions and have no clue of the answers or who might - well . . . ok . . . God does.) Again, the history of my prodigal heart reveals the wasted extravagance of friendships I severed when someone decided they weren't attending my exclusive "community" called "church". It's been hard to look them in the face in the years following. These days though, they seem much more receiving of me and I of them. They wonder what I'm up to when I show up in unexpected places. Their first thought is "what are you doing here? Is something wrong?"

Yeah . . . I've been wrong. Just like Hurricane Katrina blew to smotherines everything in it's path, I am hearing that the Spirit of God wants to blow on me. "Let the blowing loose and blowing away occur so I can blow in you what you need. I will sustain you." I think it's time to hold the traditions just a little looser for the Spirit of God to blow the dead out and blow the new in. I see those images of the whole foundations blown out from under houses. Some houses stood, some collasped. His promise is that He will sustain me. My faith journey is leading me to risk the chance that the "blowing in" will be a continuation of the full destiny God has for me.