My First Day in College - Again!

I had my first class last night. While I wish I was sitting on the banks of this lake reading my books . . . wow . . . now there's an idea!

My first class was with the acting director of our local center. He has his Phd. and has credits a MILE long. I am humbled by this man. His wife had a surgery a few months ago that went wrong somehow. He is staying home much of the time helping her back to health. It's not known for sure if she will ever be all the way back. He is really interested in each of the students. It's not about what information he gets out. It's more about what the students find that they need with the information he gives out. He's teaching Computer Information Systems. While I knew most of what he was saying about the computer program he was working with, I learned something completely diffferent from him. He gave a much simplier format for learning to write mission, purpose and vision statements. I will still have to think about those, but honestly, he made it as clear as I've ever heard it!

Tonight is Biology. I think this will be a more complicated sort of class. I guess we'll just wait and see. I have heard nothing but great reviews about the professor. He's been teaching at the university for many years. What a neat blessing to get to have him too! I better go check my threaded discussions to see if anyone has commented on my odd view of stem cell research.

When A Kid Leaves Home

Ok . . . some of you have had kids who've left home. How'd you do with that? I found out that my 24 yr old son was leaving. He's not mad or going to jail or anything like that. He's just . . . leaving. For what it's worth, he's leaving home to go live on his own in a place that is many many states away! Why? Well . . . it's a girl, of course!

They have known each other for several years. She has come here . . . he has gone there. She's going to college. He just wants to move by her to be near her. Nothing wrong with that . . .I guess. Ok . .big pout happening here!

Honestly, at his age, he should move out! (I heard what you were thinking!) He needs to experience the fun of utility bills and rent, eh? He tells me there is a great church there that his girlfriend is attending. He says that there are people with rentals there too. I guess he will get to experience what that is all about as well.

He will pack the following in his car: (of course this is all subject to change) (small Honda)
TV
stereo
computer
100 CDs (my guess)
50 DVDs (my guess again)
2 guitars
clothes will be in there somewhere

Now . . . what's missing? Furniture! A desk . . . an entertainment center . . . chest of drawers. So? What do I do with those? Makes me wonder what my mother did with all the stuff I left? As I remember, she kept asking me, "what do you want me to do with this stuff?" NOW I understand her delimma! I guess we'll just have to see what we do. Hmmmm . . . I might use that room as my study room! Wow . .just thought of that!

I thought the past year was a huge change. Whew . . . just wait for the next few months. I wonder if this means that someone will come to help me deep clean that room? (probably not, eh?)

On the Way (I think)

Could I be college bound?

Tomorrow I find out if the financial aid I think I see is really what I get. It will be interesting to see how this whole college thing pans out. I do believe God is opening doors quickly. I hope to be able to keep up!

I wonder if I can really do TWO subjects in 5 weeks? I think I will have to do a quick study of remembering how to "quickly study". Yikes! God please help my head to take what I read and translate it to understanding of topics I barely know.

My First Audio Blog

test test test



whatcha think?

This Is Just the Beginning I Think!

Paperwork . . .yep . . . even in my paperless world, people still want paperwork!

Getting ready for college is an adventure. I forgot that I never had to hunt for financial aid or anything like that when I went to college. I just worked for peanuts and still paid most of what I earned to the college. Oh wait . . . I guess it was called "work study". I don't know that I'll be doing that this time. So, the alternative is finding out if there's any financial aid out there for a mom who has raised her kids (mostly) and wants to start another career.

I've heard this is a great thing to do - that is , go back to college. So, I'm testing the waters to see what that means. This thing called Adult Learning has become quite the fad. Actually, it's helping lots of people fit in continuing education with the work a day job that pays the mortgage and puts food on the table. Of course, it also pays for all the public school fees for art, physical education and extra curricular activities like sports, cheerleading or band. Actually, maybe this going back to college thing just takes the place of all those fees paid for the kids. The kids can work and pay their own! It's time for the parents to get back to college!

But . . . is there anyway around all the paperwork? Probably not . . . so become friends with the copy place and find the nearest fax machine and keep lots of in pocket change for incidentals.

Incidentally might become a well used word in the next few years!

Another Closed Door . . . But Still On the Road

Four months ago I applied for a job. It was a stretch for me, but I thought I could grow to fulfill it. It was one of those long shots that I thought I could attain with hard work. It wasn't to be. Today, I found out that I was not chosen. I trust that the employer worked through all the details to select someone that would be best for the job. Still, it's disappointing to me . . . but that's ok.

Disappointment can either push you away or toward something. It's pushing me toward God. I feel like I'm on the road in this picture. I took the picture. I know the road. I even know what's at the crest of the hill. I don't know what's at the crest of the "hill of my future" though. This was one of those situations that I really thought I could work into. Sometimes, when people don't know you, or want to risk what you may or may not be able to do, the chance to work into something just doesn't happen. Many of my friends were trying to ease me into the fact that I wouldn't be chosen. They are good friends to care for me so much.

I guess enough time has passed that I already have my sights set on other things. Thankfully this job wasn't the only thing my mind has been set on all this time. I do have other dreams. Someone actually pushed me to voice one of those dreams yesterday . . . that will be for another post someday.

Today, though, I look back on a closed door with sadness, but clearly understanding that my whole person was not resting on that one decision. My life and purpose can't be wrapped up in one person making a decision. I think I'm fairly healthy with that perspective. Today, I'm a bit teary, but I know that tomorrow I'll look again at the days ahead with anticipation. There are good things happening in my life. I'm thankful to my Father God for His watchful eye and leading hand on my behalf.

It is God who works in me both to will and to do of His good pleasure!

One Door Closed - Others to Open?

Yesterday was a huge day for me. It was the end of 25 years of being connected to a church and a family of believers. It was interesting because I knew that the timing was right. The pain I've felt for this past year had brought me to the ability to let go and know that God will still be with me and work through me. I feel like I do when I'm hunting for a new job. I keep thinking I need to have something to show for my day. It doesn't make sense, I know!

I AM job hunting. I lined up several jobs that I think I'd like to apply for. I have to decide, though, if I want to be gone 40 hours a week. I don't think I want to do that. My daughter's schooling is too important and she's getting Spring Fever. It's hard to keep her moving, but we're working on it. I'd like not to have to get a 40 hr per week job - maybe just at 20-25 hour one that pays about $10. Does that sound too hard? (I know . .not for God!)

I'm looking at financial aid this week as well. My goal at this time is to get a BA in Organizational Management for Christian Leaders with a minor in Psychology. I'd like to then go on to get a MA in Counseling. I should be able to do it at Colorado Christian University. This adult learning program allows me to take a course in a 5 week block - attending class one night a week as well as reading paper books, corresponding internet info and threaded discussions. There are just lots of details to iron out before I can jump full throttle into the coursework.

Now I need clarity to be able to write essays for scholarships. They don't have to be all that long - just clear and succinct. I pray for a free flowing sense of writing. I can get drowsy writing in the afternoon. I need to get it in gear though!

Someone just told me there are scholarships for left handed people? Gotta find those!

It Felt Good to Speak Again

Even though it's been awhile, I wasn't as nervous as I thought as I shared my testimony with the women's ministry group at Canyon View Vineyard Church last night. After one of my friends questioned what I was originally asked to do, I realized that I don't think my testimony is all that interesting or exciting. It was important though for me to do as I was instructed - not add to or assume. The leaders are incredibly gracious, so their promptings were received well.

As I put the testimony together, I found that I had a page of stuff that I have done for the last 30 some years. It's amazing to see how the Lord has been gracious in my life. Sometimes I think what I have done isn't all that interesting. I guess that remains to be seen.

Probably the most precious part for me was to share who I am. I made a list of some of the most difficult times in my life and some of the most meaningful times in my life. I realized as I recalled different events - difficult or meaningful - that these things have made me who I am. My thought processes and deep seated feelings flow out of these experiences. It makes me think of the Romans 5 passage that talks about "tribulation working patience, patience experience, and experience hope." The part of that passage that touches me is the fact that hope makes me not ashamed.

Just for the record, I thought I'd put those two lists here.

Some of the most difficult times in my life have included:

1. the suicide of a boyfriend
2. the leaving of my father and basic disinterest in me
3. trusting again that God would bring the love of my life back into my life
4. finding a friend who left without explanation
5. trusting that another friend would not do the same thing
6. realizing that some things have a season of time and are not forever
7. understanding that pouring my whole heart into something doesn't necessarily mean that it was wrong to do that - it's not always reciprocated or even appreciated
8. understanding that God loves me . . . period
9. making a choice to change my entire church family base and leave what was me for the last 25 years

Some of the most meaningful times of my life have included:

1. coming to know Jesus Christ as my personal Savior
2. experiencing the revelation of the Father heart of God
3. watching people grow in their giftings as they are mentored
4. slowly working myself out of a job as others have been mentored to do what I've done
5. talking about God with my children
6. seeing my kids learn from me and go on to do things better than what I do
7. realizing that God is not finished with me yet
8. living peacefully with myself when I am not sure what the future holds for me in career and ministry

I received an email this morning that encouraged my heart. It said, "I really enjoyed your story last night. The part about taking risks really spoke to me. I am definitely not a risk taker. In fact, my prayer request last night was for courage to be able to do so."

Thank You, Father for being there with us. You knew each heart and each need. I pray that You will continue to visit with those who opened their hearts to You. Whether it was about risks, or losses or new seasons, be ever so close as each one makes such important choices for their future. Faithful are You who calls us . . . who also will do it. Amen