Pulling Close

There were many action words in the sermon this week at The Clifton Vineyard. In worship I saw myself IN the love of God and Him casting fear away from me.  I wonder if I think I thought it was MY love that casts out fear. Can I have perfect love? Don't think so. Can God have perfect love? Yes! Going through challenges doesn't exactly make me feel loving. "Why" questions usually arise. Often it's more about what I might have done wrong to cause this bad thing.  Interestingly, I know the "rain falls on the just and the unjust" so I know I'm still working past some shame based stuff.

I've felt safe with God for a longtime, but imagine the picture of God holding me through the challenges. My pastor said the idea is like a fireman rushing into the burning house and snatching the person to hold them close to him as he runs out to safety.  This is a picture of The Lord rescuing us.  I don't imagine I know always from what I am being rescued. That's probably a good thing!

I've been trying to figure out what I'm supposed to do these days to serve. I was involved in worship leading for the better part of 25 years.  I was involved in prayer ministries for years. I know you don't lose the heart to pray or worship but should you always be smack dab in the middle? Is there someplace I am supposed to be that is new for the new time in my life at this point? The worship leader yesterday mentioned, just in passing, as we were waiting on the Lord that "the calling was still there". It caught my attention . . . what calling? Now I'm curious . . .